Tamela Mann Shares Relationship Advice for Long-Lasting Love
Tamela Mann Shares Advice for Finding Long-Lasting Love

Source: Maury Phillips / Getty
Tamela Mann’s latest album, LIVE BREATHE FIGHT, was a labor of love, but luckily love is her greatest motivation to keep going.
“I think that’s what’s keeping me alive, the love,” the singer, actor, designer, and cooking show host tells ELEV8. “God keeps putting people around me to love.”
One such loveable person God has placed in her life is Mann’s business partner, co-author, co-star, and husband, David Mann. The pair have been coupled for “36 years with no separation,” Tamela Mann boasts, and they often appear on screen together in Tyler Perry’s Madea films or on their YouTube channel, MANN TV, that hosts her cooking show as well as other original programming featuring the couple. The pair do almost everything together from music to movies, and Tamela says the secret to their success in business and marriage is that they put their friendship first.
“The glue to our marriage is our friendship. That’s how we started our relationship, as a friendship first.” Because they built their relationship from the ground up, continuing to build and grow together comes naturally. “We’re walking in the same direction and building and hoping for the same things. That’s what’s worked for us. We’re not a perfect marriage. We have arguments and disagreements, too. Yes, he gets on my nerves…but we have always tried to outdo each other doing for each other. That means nothing goes slacking, nothing goes wanting.”
And nothing goes without being said. Mann emphasizes that communication is key to keeping their love strong.
“When you’re best friends, you tell each other everything,” she shares. “As you get older you’re going to change so you have to talk things through with the communication in order to have a really lively, vibrant, thriving relationship. I don’t want [him] to spare my feelings because that’s not going to help me grow.”
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“Every five to ten years, you grow into a new person! You got a new babe or new honey on your shoulder,” Mann continues. “I try to reinvent myself, give David a new look, give David a new woman, do something a little sparky, a little different when it comes to the sex life to make it hot. That’s important to me.”
The Manns embrace the inevitable changes that come with being together for so long and they’ve even written a book to help advise others on how to find the love of their lives. But Tamela Mann advises that young women looking for love first find love within themselves: Starting with prayer and putting God first.
“Pray and ask God to let them find you,” she advises. “And while you’re waiting, you’re working on yourself.” Mann emphasizes working on yourself mentally, spiritually, and physically so that you feel prepared and confident before going into a new relationship.
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“One thing that me and [David] came up with is you have to become the list,” Mann explains. “A lot of times, we want people to have all these things. But are you working toward having these things yourself and being this person? Make a list of the things that you desire and want [in a partner] and you have to become the list of what you would desire.”
It took work for Mann herself to become the object of her own desires. In her younger years, she struggled with self-esteem that resulted in one-sided relationships and broken hearts. “For years, I was a shadow chick. I came up with the word, meaning, when a person really doesn’t want to commit to you or really be with you until the night time. They drop by, it’s always late or real early when people can’t see them coming in or out.”
These days, Mann wants women of all ages to remember not to settle and to know their worth.
“Know that you are God’s favor. Know that you are IT all the way around,” she says. “A lot of times we as women put it all out there, we do all the things to show a person ‘I’m with you and I got you, baby. I’ma take care of you, I’m here for you’ but you don’t get that in return because you don’t require it. So know your requirements! Things aren’t going to be perfect. You’re still going to have to do some work, but don’t give up and don’t settle.”
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Tamela Mann Shares Advice for Finding Long-Lasting Love was originally published on elev8.com